Hanging up my Hat
I have put off writing about this because I’ve been on the fence on and off. Through much prayer, thought, and discussion…I have decided I am Hanging up my Hat. After 20 years of homeschooling and graduating almost 4 of my 7 children…I am done.
So Many Reasons
I always knew that I would just *know* when I was done. It’s a feeling I knew that the Lord would give me. Peace. This is the peace that surpasses all understanding. I have that peace.
Since about 2014, I have been fighting this thought. So much has happened. Revelations in my marriage, myself, the loss of my Lady, daddy’s stroke and quadruple, Hunter’s illness, incarceration of his mom (my niece), dealing with the escalation of a couple of my children. Just so much. I am so tired.
I will not be shamed for not home educating my children. If you have the inclination to mom shame me, just stop where you are at. I feel as if I have accomplished a great feat. My oldest daughter graduated with honors, from college, a year early. She is happy, employed at a job she loves, and is doing well.
Daughter #2 is thriving in college and loves it. She is on her own, working fulltime and going to graduate in May of 2020. Daughter #3 will graduate in December of 2019 and start college in the Spring of 2020. This is a huge deal for her. She has struggled due to choices of birthparents and she is learning to overcome. Son #1 graduated high school in May of 2019, started a fulltime job, and is starting college this month. He is taking 21 hrs his first semester. I am INCREDIBLY proud of all of them.
What My Thoughts are Now
I am relieved, in a sense. There has never been a moment when I have not supported our local public school system. It has its flaws but I know some great people at the board, principals, teachers, aides, school nurses, bus drivers, etc. They love my kids and that is a wonderful thing.
I am open to change (though I hate it). If things do not work out for one or more of my kids, I will pull them back out. I have no issues with that and the Director of Pupil Personnel knows that as well. Openness is important and so is communication!
Still So Much
We travel so much for Hunter. That is a fact that does not change. He will miss a lot of schools but it is what it is. Jude made the middle school baseball team. That is A LOT of time and work and adjustment. Daniel…we shall see. He is not thrilled at starting school. I hope that he adjusts well and that his needs are accommodated.
At the End of the Day
There is a lot I am proud of that I have accomplished throughout my years. I have learned so much, overcome so much, been through so much and still, I have pressed on. My husband is proud of me. The kids are my greatest supporters and their willingness to step out of their box continues to impress me.
This is a new day, a new chapter. Hopefully, all things of the past can be healed within my heart. I hope to go back to counseling full-time. It is time for me to focus on serious self-care and reflection. Though, I hope that time does not take long. I’ve been taking this summer to really try and take care of myself during all of the chaos.
Please lift up my family, as you think of it, during this massive transition. God is bigger.