Life or Something Like It

The TikTok I Didn’t Know I Needed

The TikTok I Didn’t Know I Needed

The TikTok I Didn't Know I Needed
Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com

The TikTok I Didn’t Know I Needed after a bad couple of weeks. I was aimlessly scrolling today and this caught my attention. Now, I have not watched all this person’s content, nor will I (probably) but this one struck a chord in me. There is music and captions that contains some coarse language, but if you overlook that, you will get the idea of his message.

This is a positivity account, from what I have gathered. Self-love, letting go of the negative, self-care, knowing your worth, etc. It is a message that people need to hear and adapt to their lives. You know, life doesn’t have to be as hard as we make it. There is so much that I “own” that isn’t mine to own.

I allow guilt and the things that people say to me impact me way too much. Honestly, I don’t view myself through the lens of what Jesus says about me. I view myself through the lens of others and what they say about me. Some of these people know me but a lot of them don’t.

Motto of Sorts

I say, a lot, that if someone has not had their feet under my table, they don’t have an opinion. However, even when they have had their feet under my table, they still don’t truly know. For instance, with the illness of one of my children…there have been people (family) that has been with me every step of this battle with my child. However, they still don’t really get it because they don’t live it 24/7. They see what I want them to see. Does that even make sense? Honestly, even my husband doesn’t know it all because he had to stay home and take care of business here.

Adoption and Trauma

It’s the same with adoption trauma or any trauma for that matter. I get so tired of hearing what a saint we are for taking in kids. No. Just no. We are not saints and we are not perfect parents. If I shared with you half of what our journey comprised of it would curl your toenails. It was a choice that we made to live out the gospel how we were called to live it out. Not perfect, but obedient. It has been hard. Honestly, it is still hard.

Geez, I have a lot to say on that but right now my head is not in the right space to do so.

LukeMindPower

That is the handle of this guy. I am sure he is on multiple platforms, but this is the one that I have seen. I have said, most of the week, that it has been really bad around here. The last two weeks have been rough. This is the caption of what he said (again, pardon the language).

“You are powerful and you’re seeing this for a reason! The devil wouldn’t be attacking u so hard if there wasn’t something valuable in you… Thieves don’t break into an empty house. You’re only stressin’ cause ur not giving up! A weak mf would’ve folded. Keep going.”

I am valuable. Worthy. Loved and a child of the King.

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Epically Bad Day…One for the Books

Epically Bad Day…One for the Books

Epically Bad Day...One for the Books

Epically Bad Day…One for the Books. I mean seriously. My intentions were to do my grocery shopping, cook supper, get the house straightened up, do my nails, wrap presents, and just chill. There was no chill. It has been balls to the wall since about 6:47 am.

If something could go wrong, it did.

I fielded about ten phone calls before 7 am.

Attended a school before 8.

Cried in the Sonic parking lot by 8:45.

Made 1.2 million phone calls.

Got several emergency doctor appointments made.

Accomplished supper, in a round about way.

Picked a kid up from school.

Finished supper.

Cried more.

Got more phone calls from people I didn’t want to talk to.

Confronted some a person.

Finished cooking supper only to realize my anxiety would not let me eat it.

Cried again.

Reached out for prayer.

Spoke the Name of Jesus.

Took a hot shower and cried more.

I am struggling in motherhood.

The thought is that I will never be enough.

PTSD at its finest.

Slept 6 straight hours.

Day is over.

Tomorrow

Is going to be better.

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