Large Family Happenings

Honoring My Lady and My Best Friend

Honoring My Lady and My Best Friend

Honoring My Lady and My Best Friend

Today, I am Honoring My Lady and My Best Friend. Every time I see this picture, my goodness this Lady is GORGEOUS in red! That was my favorite color on her. She is smiling because it was her 81st birthday and her “boyfriend,” aka Big Daddy, was taking her on a fish date. I was the third wheel because all best friends are great third wheels.

How She Loved Bart

She loved him so much. Even during a very trying time in our marriage, where she could have just said: “Leave him,” but she did not say that. What she did was carry my weary body into her home, place her beautiful hand on my hand and the other on my head, and prayed.

Then, she picked up the phone and called a trusted and amazing human. She briefly (and discreetly) said a few things and then hung up the phone. As she looked up at me with tears in her eyes and a smile on her face, she said: “It is going to be okay.”

In Time

It was, but during that “it time” part, she held me accountable in my words and actions. She also had another man work with Bart. Together, they walked with us through the mud. Our marriage is stronger because of the prayers and the advice that we received.

I miss her so much that I physically ache. Everyone should have a Ms. Jo. I mean everyone. Someone strong, not afraid to speak her mind, and loves so completely. I never doubted that she loved me. She never doubted that I loved her.

I Wish We Had More Time

We had little time, ten years maybe, not long enough. It is as simple as that. What started as me admiring grace and beauty (and her voice) moved onto noticing her beautifully crooked finger. Then it matriculated into me timidly requesting her to be my mentor. Quickly, followed by me sitting on her porch and squalling. I cried so bad that she said we were making the neighbors talk, and for the love of all to get in the house.

Next, it moved to me helping out here and there. Going to lunch and running errands. Lastly, it moved more into caregiving and sitting with my Lady. Many nights of me making supper and us eating it together while watching Jag. Cleaning. Oh my goodness, I cleaned things out. We looked at her billions of pictures, and I soaked up all her memories.

Find a Mentor

Talk to your church and see if you can set up a mentor/mentee program. It is so worth every moment! “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” Titus 2:3-5).

You will not regret it. I miss you, Lady. More than I can even describe. My best friend, person, mentor, accountability partner, teacher. I am so excited to see you again! Until we see each other again, in heaven, I love your face off!

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2 Years Have Passed

2 Years Have Passed

2 Years Have Passed

Welp, 2 Years Have Passed since my beautiful Lady saw Jesus (and Jerome) face to face.  Somedays, it feels like an eternity.  Then, there are days that the stinging pain is fresh.

Grief is a beast.

I have never been one that has been okay with the loss.  Like never have I been okay in the history of ever.  Never.  I try to be all mature and stoic.  Then, that moment when I am alone, it hits.

Overwhelming sadness and tears.  When I am alone, I can let my guard down and just mourn.  Boo says that I can’t cry because that would be like Superman with a broken arm.  It isn’t the norm and, to him, it isn’t okay.  He does not like to see me upset at all.

Frankly, none of my kids do and when I do get emotional, Big Daddy buys me something LOL.  I guess that is their way of “fixing” the giant hole in my heart that she left.  In a creepy way, I drive by her house.  I’m sickened with how they have let the yard go.  One day, there were mattresses on her front lawn.

Freaking.  Mattresses.

She would have NEVER allowed that.  Honestly, she would have strapped those things on my back like a pack mule and I would have hauled them out.  Or, in her fashion, she’d call her ‘boyfriend’ (Big Daddy) to come and get them.  In his true fashion, he would hop at her command.

Oh, she had a hold on him.  I loved how she loved him.  One day, she called me, in a panic.  I thought something was wrong.  She says get over there and I stop everything and go.  That was our thing.

Walked in on a Disturbed Lady

She was standing in the kitchen when I flew in and this was the conversation that we had:

L:  Look what was on my front porch and back porch!

**Holds up 2 baggies that had a letter and a mint in each baggie.  I get the baggie and pull out the letter.  It was an invitation to the KKK.**

Me:  Josephine…what on earth!  Did you hear anyone?

L:  No but I don’t have a gun anymore either so what am I supposed to do?  They must have seen your kids out here working in the yard.  Those **insert dirty words**.

Me:  What would you like me to do?

L:  Take that filth home with you.  Get it out of my house.

Me:  Yes, Ma’am.

L:  When are you bringing supper?

Me:  When I get it fixed.

L:  Are you eating with me?

Me:  I always do!

L:  Are the mints safe to eat or are they tainted with hate?

Me:  I vote tainted with hate.

L:  Shame, I love those mints.  See you soon.  Love you.

Me:  I love you more.

L:  That is not possible.

My Heart

So, now, recounting that…I’m going to have to go and cry now.  I’m alone, licked the cheese off a 1/2 a bag of Doritos, no one will see me…it’s all good.

Lady…until I see you again.  We are gonna make some Poke Salad, Cornbread, and fry some fish.  Plus, as a bonus, I can finally meet your Jerome.

I love your face off and I miss you every single day.

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