Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

On the Eve One of the Worst Days of My Life

On the Eve One of the Worst Days of My Life

On the Eve One of the Worst Days of My Life

On the Eve One of the Worst Days of My Life, I sit here.  Also, I listen to the giggles of a boy that I thought I would never raise.  What a blessed sound.

February 2010

My story began years and years ago, but for the purpose of this blog, I will fast forward to Feb. 2010.  My husband and I decided to expand our family through the blessing of adoption, once again.  This time, we were going to forego the foster system, as it was a rough 3 yrs trying to adopt 2 of our children.  We wanted to head across the ocean.  Ethiopia was our heart and that is where our passion lay.

Paper Pregnancy

Adoption is called a paper pregnancy for a reason.  It is a paper chase nightmare.  Adopted domestically, from the foster care system and adopting internationally are two completely different beasts, yet the goal is the same.  Our children.  We did everything as quickly as possible, collection-wise then we chose our home study agency.  We had our visits, turned in our masses of stuff, and then there was our first delay.

Our worker, left the country, for a week, to go and pick up her daughter.  A delay with purpose, yet still a delay.  Our adoption agency worked with another agency and midstream of our adoption, they severed ties with their “partner” agency and partnered with another.  Delay.  It took a bit for us to meet the requirements and get the added stuff for the new partner agency, but we did.

While We Waited

In the meantime, we were fingerprinted, had our stuff turned in for 171-H approval (US immigration approval) and we waited…we did fundraisers, we filed for grants, we took out a loan, we sent letters and we waited.  We were blessed in June of 09 to see a picture of our son.  It was an older picture, he was only 3 and he was 4, in actuality, but oh my goodness…..the preciousness was unspeakable.  I fell in love.

Ready to Travel

By Oct. 10, we were ready to travel to meet him and adopt him.  We still hadn’t gotten immigration approval, but we were assured that they were now centralizing USCIS in one location and we weren’t forgotten, just delayed.  Travel was a go.  We traveled 30 hrs…we anticipated what the first moments would be like.

What would he think of us, how would he react, what were we going to see (as neither one of us had ever been to a developing country).  We were blessed, however, to meet up with 2 other couples that were adopting, older children.  They were both with our agency, live in Louisville and we were staying in the same place.

Arrival in Ethiopia

We arrived in ET, in awe and unsure of our next step. Then we met the most wonderful man in all of ET, Woudneh Mulugeta.  Amazing.  There was a crowd of people, waiting for their loved ones and through the crowd, we saw this lovely man, with bright eyes and a beautiful smile…ready to take us on our adventure.  He led us to our hotel, where the staff was amazing, the tribal dancing was mesmerizing and the food…..delicious.  We were set to go to KVI the next morning.  None of us slept.

Meeting our Son

We set off the next morning…anxious, nervous, amazed at the sites we were seeing….then, there it was, the giant iron gate that separated a love that had been in my heart since I was a child and someone we had prayed for since the beginning of the year.  We pulled in and there were SO MANY KIDS.  Most of them were sitting on the curb, patiently waiting.  Others were swarming the van.  Amongst the sea of brown faces, I saw my son…sitting on the curb, bouncing his soccer ball.  I started saying “there he is, Bart, there he is, there is our son…isn’t he beautiful.”  Tears came up in my eyes and a lump in my throat.  My dream was being fulfilled.  God’s promises were being fulfilled.  I was overwhelmed.

So Many Kids

We couldn’t even get out of the van because there was a multitude of kids climbing in the van.  They wanted so much to be loved, held, paid attention to.  These kids wanted to look in our backpacks, see what cool trinkets we had for them. They wanted affection. Also, they wanted to be the “chosen” ones.  We made our way, to our son, with 10 kids hanging off our legs.  I squatted down and introduced myself and I braced myself for the first time I would touch him.  I had prayed for this child and I had prayed for this moment.

Touching my Son

I reached over and I touched his shoulder and I felt warm water and chills move through my body.  It was like he instantly knew we were his because from that moment on, there was no language barrier…there were no words spoken, yet he was attached to us.  He held our hands, showed us his tricks, was introduced to M & Ms and peanut butter crackers.  We looked at books, photos…no words were spoken, just affection, touch, love.  He belonged to us and we belonged to him.  It was hands down, one of the most beautiful moments of my life.  I will say, right now, for those reading this….it doesn’t take carrying a child, in your womb, to be a mom.  It takes from the moment you see them until God calls you home to be a mom.

Our Time with Him

We got to spend about 3 days with him.  We watched him play, eat, do school, sing, sleep, slide, snot, cry, laugh…we watched it all.  The fact that once we got home, would be another 6 weeks for our Embassy appt was almost too much to bear.  The pain of leaving him was unspeakable.  What got me through was Woudneh, the Transition House, Betty, the love of the nannies, and the fact that he would be home before Christmas.

Home

We arrived home on the 14th of Oct.  We showed our other 5 children videos and pictures and we waited, anxiously for word of our Embassy date.  On Oct. 15th….our world shattered.  We got our first, of many, denials from the United States Immigration.  We were told, due to a law that was not regarded by someone in our adoption circle, that we would not be allowed immigration clearance.  Also, that we would not be allowed to bring our precious son home.  I remember going to the mailbox and seeing that bright pink piece of paper.  Then, ripping it open and falling in the driveway.  There I was, on my knees, crying to my Lord and for my son.  Every day that passed, was another day lost and another day that he was without his mommy and daddy to love him.

Fight, Pray, Beg, Cry, Repeat

We fought, we prayed, we begged, we cried, we pleaded…..on Thanksgiving 2010, we received our final denial.  It was over.  There was nothing we could do.  We did our homework, we had conference calls with those involved and we contemplated me and the children moving to ET for 2 yrs, while my husband stayed here to work and send us money.  Depression set in, for me.  It was a black time.  I remember my daughter saying “mom, you never smile anymore.”  All I did was cry.  My husband was convinced that he had lost me.  Speaking to a friend of mine, the other day, she said when I would attend class, once or twice, I would get tickled and giggle and they would all secretly be praising the Lord for me laughing.

We Chose to Fight

For all of 2010 and most of 2011, we fought.  Then, we hired the top immigration adoption attorney in the states.  Next, we got a new home study agency.  Then, we got new fingerprints.  Basically, we paid for his adoption twice.  Also, we added an attorney’s fee on top of it.  Our attorney told us we were fighting an uphill battle and that she would do everything possible, but the outcome was bleak and we needed to prepare ourselves and our family for the next stage of life and what we were going to do.

Family Changes

After homeschooling for 12 yrs, I put 4 of my kids in public school and I got a job and worked full time up our income. We hired a new home study agent (Forever Family Adoptions).  The incredible Jessica, she was our cheerleader.  Also, we got a date for new fingerprinting.  It was decided to go early.  All the while fearing we would be turned away.  They got us in immediately.  We were struggling with money and our church offered to have a yard sale for us.  All I had to do was show up, everything else was done for me.  We all know that yard sales are horrible and very rarely is money made….to our shock, in 2 1/2 days, we made $3000.  That was enough to pay for our fingerprinting, our visas, our son’s visa, and attorney’s fee.

Everything Expired

We got word that ALL of our paperwork was expired, so it ALL had to be redone, including the birth mom’s interview.  Woudneh sent a wonderful man, into the jungle to find his mom and bring her back to Addis…not once but twice.  Woudneh and his team worked none stop getting us what we needed.  His sweet wife and kids went almost daily to see our son and play with him, love him, hug him when other children would leave.  We had hope, in Christ, but not hope in anything else.  I still struggled, my kids struggled, the school was hard for them…I wasn’t home much.  It was a horrible time.

Breaking the Rules

The same week we were denied the previous year, I actually called immigration…I wasn’t supposed too, per my attorney’s advice, but I wanted to see what they needed or where we were.  I never imagined my officer would answer the phone.  She did, I stuttered, stumble, and otherwise acted like an idiot.  I didn’t want to offend her, make her mad, and then get denied again.  That woman, well, she was a God-send.  She was compassionate and understanding and she was determined to see our case finished.

A Miracle

Our son was now 5.  I was sitting in the closet, fearing the worse and then hearing words that still affect me, to this day.  “Mrs. Crum, we have reviewed everything and I am approving your case.”  I couldn’t speak.  I couldn’t understand what she was saying.  I asked her to repeat herself and she said: “Mrs. Crum, you are approved.”  I started weeping, uncontrollably and I couldn’t stop thanking her and praising my Lord.

She was weeping, I was weeping….it was one of those cries that you simply can’t stop, no matter how hard you tried.  I gathered my wits.  Then, I finally got off the phone, dropped to my knees praising my Lord.  Next, I got my big girls and headed off to Pella, where Bart worked.  I have no idea what I was wearing, but I must have looked a bit of a mess.  The girls and I walked into the HR office and I asked to speak to my husband.

Telling Big Daddy

The sweet girl said this must be an emergency because I couldn’t get a complete sentence out.  She took me to a private office and he came rushing in. It was like a moment out of a movie…I stood up and said APPROVED and we melted into each other’s arms.  It was over.  God had won.  We were bringing our son home.  It was over.

Getting Our Son

We traveled in Dec. 2011 to bring our baby home.  Fearing he wouldn’t remember us, fearing institutionalization, fearing the worst….we boarded our flight and 30+ hours of travel later…we saw the bright eyes of Woudneh and he personally drove us to the TransitiHouseuse.  We pulled through the iron gates and in a complete contrast of the 2 yrs prior, there was no one in the courtyard.

Beauty that Unfolded

We pulled around, he parked, and then we saw a group of nannies walking, hand in hand, and in the middle was the most precious boy I have ever laid eyes on with the biggest smile you could ever see.  He was smiling so big, you couldn’t even see his eyes.  Also, he was dressed in his best white outfit holding a bouquet of wildflowers.  Then, he hugged us.  Oh, and he called us mom and dad and told us he loved us.  I kept telling him over and over, we loved him.  That we didn’t forget him or leave him.  Also that we had been fighting so hard for him.  Finally, God was so good.  He knew us.  We melted together, laughed together.  That moment sends me over the emotional edge.

God is Real

God’s faithfulness is real.  The desires that He puts in us, as children, will be fulfilled if we follow that lamp that has been set at our feet.  My heart is full of joy. Our son is amazing and he brings more joy than I could have ever imagined.  Praise His Name for being bigger than immigration, bigger than those who said that we wouldn’t win.  He is bigger.

 

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Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

One Small or HUGE Note

One Small or HUGE Note

WE PASSED COURT!

Just in case you didn’t know our One Small or HUGE Note.  Oh gracious, the feeling of being able to say that is so exciting.  I just cannot believe it.  We passed.  That is such a huge deal.  We were so nervous.  Woudneh, our go-to guy, told us some of the questions that were going to be asked.  He also said how we should conduct ourselves and speak clearly.

The judge was gorgeous and soft-spoken.  We were both sweating bullets and could barely hear what she was saying.  There were moments when we would look at Woudneh with confusion.  His gentle eyes would calm us and we would gather ourselves.  Then, we would be able to confidently answer her.

I’m sure you needed to hear that again, cause I sure do need to say it again!  We passed court in Ethiopia.  Our son is now, officially, our son.  He is Abinet Bart Crum.  Rest assured, we will be changing his name, once in America!  By this passing of the court thing in Ethiopia, he has become an American citizen.

 

Next Step

We will fly home for about 6 weeks.  Our next step is to wait for confirmation from USCIS and to get the go-ahead to head back to Ethiopia to bring him home.  He will be home for the holidays!  That is the plan, for now.  I guess it is all subject to change with the Ethiopian government.  Hopefully, we will be able to travel with the same group of people.

It has been nice getting to know them and their kids.  This experience will definitely keep us all bonded for a lifetime.  I hope we will be able to keep our kids in touch, though most of the children won’t remember.  What beauty for us, as adults and parents.  Yet, the sadness these children face and their families left behind does not escape me.

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Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

God is SO good

God is SO good

God is SO good. I have criteria before I make any significant decisions…..I mean, it is all in my control, right? 

Sis called and stated that I need to go on this first trip. That was not in my schedule o plans. B was going to go on the first trip, for court. I was going to go on the second trip to pick up my little man. If I *didn’t* go, we’d have to readopt him after 6 mths in the states. Not a problem. 

Knowing the Right People

We know a lawyer who does this as his ministry. All we’d have to pay is court costs. If I *did* go, then when the judge said “yes,” he would automatically be a US citizen. We wouldn’t have to readopt…no brainer. I’d stay home with the kids the first round, and he’d stay home the second round. 

Busyness

So, I’d made arrangements, paid fees, talked to mom about having a wreath booth in the Hunter’s Moon Festival in Grand Rivers on the 9th (the day B was supposed to leave for Africa). Also, there was the childcare issue and the whole money issue. 

It just seemed to fit, and then sis calls and blah blah blah blah blah wants me to go on the first trip. “Make the call, reserve your tickets, step out on faith,” Easier said than done. I know, that is horrible, but I’m trying here!

Travel Agent, Maybe

I let last week go by without calling the travel agent. Sadly, I just couldn’t do it. I put it off. We had enough for him to go on this first trip alone, and hopefully, we had raised enough for me to go on the second trip. On Saturday, we had the city-wide yard sale…I went with my MIL. 

Huge Surprise

We ginned around town, and then we stopped to eat at our favorite little sandwich shop. At one point, we got to talking about the trip and what our dilemmas were. She stopped me dead in my tracks and said: “I’ll take care of the kids…no big deal.” Wow. That is huge of her to offer. I also had 2 friends willing to take the day shift and my mom willing to do a couple of days. God fixed that.  

Another God Moment

Guilt overcame me because I had committed to this booth, sent in the registration, and paid the fee. I tried to find someone to operate the booth, and no one was able to. My mom was willing to help set up but not stay….so I’m in a pickle. 

That Sunday evening, my mom called, and she said for me not to worry because she and my aunt were going to do the booth on that day! Wow! That is huge, too! We can still fundraise, and my aunt is willing to help. My mom and her sister together…..Grand Rivers will *never* be the same! God fixed that.

Listening

Well, this morning, during my study…God laid on my heart to let go of my laziness/idleness and start doing what I’m supposed to do. Stop putting things off. So, I decided to call all 5 kids upstairs…we worked for HOURS on my bathroom/bedroom/closet. The bathroom looked so nice. 

About 11 am, I thought…I’m gonna do it. Finally, I decided to call and order the tickets. I had sent Boo out to check the mail, and there was nothing. He came in, resumed work, and I came down to make the call. Finally, I did it. I ordered tickets for both of us.

God is Good

My heart was wrenched. Honestly, I couldn’t breathe. I was trusting that we could fundraise for my trip in Nov/Dec. Got that phone call taken care of and went back upstairs to work. About 10 minutes later, Boo came upstairs with the mail in hand. I sifted through it and on top was a letter from ShowHope. 

For some reason, I knew they’d be sending it but didn’t expect it till the end of the week. There was a moment where I was hesitant to open it. We had been turned down by every other grant place. ShowHope will send a letter one way or the other. So, I stood…opened it….and we were awarded A HUGE GRANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are done…money is there, waiting, ready…..GOD FIXED IT!

I’m so humbled and thankful for His many provisions! Praising His Name. Also, I am jumping up and down!

Jude….here we come!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

Missing my Boy So Much

Missing my Boy So Much

Missing my Boy So Much

Missing my Boy So Much.  How is it even possible to miss someone that you’ve never met?  Can it be the same as loving a baby that you are pregnant with?  I remember my first pregnancy, and it was a heartfelt yearning for seeing what this little person looked like, being able to hold this little person and pour all your love into a being that you’ve never met, you just know that you are carrying within you.
The Ache of Adoption
It was almost an ache, the last few months.  Not the ache of pregnancy, but the ache of being *so* ready, so past ready to meet this child.  I loved being pregnant.  The kicks, squirms, hiccups…watching my belly transform before my eyes from normal to completely transformed into a temporary home for my child.
My womb was warm, and my kids could feel my emotions, ate what I ate…I nourished this baby, loved this baby, protected this baby.  Nothing could get to her, she was safe, and she would fall asleep to the sound of my heartbeat.  Wow, how cool is that!
His Orphanage
My son’s temporary home is an orphanage.  He is in a Christian orphanage.  I’m hoping that he is loved on.  He eats when he can eat.  Sadly, he must share because the food is limited in Africa.  I don’t know if he is too warm or too cold if he has a bed or who protects him.  He doesn’t fall asleep to the lull of calming voices or his mom’s heartbeat.  In short, he left everything that he knew.  His village, his birth mom, and his siblings.  He was loved by his birth family, but due to poverty and illness, she wasn’t able to care for him.  I can not even imagine sacrificing like that.  God has a special place for those women who selflessly give up their children so they can have a future, a life…..so they can eat, be loved on, and make a difference in this world.
My Love for An Ethiopian Boy
I’ve never met him, though I love him.  On the other hand, I’ve never heard his laugh, but I smile when I see a picture of him smiling.  Amazingly, I’ve never told him that I love him, yet I would give my life for him.  I’m aching to see him.  Aching to touch him, hold him, feed him, love him and tell him of the sacrifice that his mom made and the ultimate sacrifice that my God made for him in sending His Son to die for him.
If all goes well on Oct. 1 and we pass court, my DH will be meeting our son for the first time that next week.  He will get to hold him, laugh and cry with him and love him, just like the Father loved His Son.  How precious.  Soon, he will be home, and we will be in a whole new world.
Today, I’m missing my son.

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Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

We Have a Court Date

We Have a Court Date

We Have a Court Date

I cannot believe I am even uttering these words but We Have a Court Date!  Seriously, I cannot even fathom this concept.  This has been such a long adoption process!

WE HAVE A COURT DATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My first thought is AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, my second thought is AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH and my final thought is God doesn’t work on timelines, yet we have one zooming down the road. We have to raise A LOT of money between now and October!

Please pray that (God willing) we pass court A and then have the money for court B and then 6 wks later have more money to fly again to pick him up!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Praise the Lord!

Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

5 Things Nobody Told You About International Ethiopian Adoption

5 Things Nobody Told You About International Ethiopian Adoption
5 Things Nobody Told You About International Ethiopian Adoption
Here are 5 Things Nobody Told You About International Ethiopian Adoption. I thought adopting through the foster care system was hard.  Although, international adoption has taken the cake.  It has been one of the hardest things to deal with throughout this adoption process. In reality, it isn’t for the faint-hearted. Here are some things to note. For one thing, is that you have to put your life on hold for your precious little one.
Also, paperwork snafus happen, delays happen, lack of communication or miscommunication happens.  In spite of it all, there isn’t a single day that I don’t think of my son. Furthermore, I wonder how he is or if he’s been hugged today. I found myself getting angry.  Why won’t you hurry up, what do you mean you need *more* paperwork, why isn’t this in the country, why don’t you call me back?  I can’t buy that extra gallon of milk because I can use that money towards the adoption. 
Large Family Adoption Preparation
As a wise woman told me (she’s an elderly lady LOL, love to you, T), adoption isn’t necessarily about providing a child with a home.  It is more about it sanctifying us. All things happen for a reason, and God’s hand is all over my son.  During this lovely adoption miscommunication and all the other little delays, God has this situation. All things work together for good and to give Him honor and praise. I do not want the glory of adoption, I want my Lord to have it all.
All the time, I hear people say how impressed they are and how I’m saving a life. I didn’t save a life…God chose my family and me to bless our home through adoption, and HE saved our lives. This was His choice, not necessarily mine. I’m merely being obedient, and I’m learning how to be patient. That is a hard lesson to learn, for me. I’m not the most patient person in the world.
Foster to Adopt and International Adoption
For now, I have my pictures, I have a video, I have my thoughts, and I have tons of prayers. I’m willing to answer (or find the answer) to any adoption question you might have. I’ve adopted through our foster care system, and now I’m adopting internationally. Sincerely pray and ask God how He might use you and your family. Your job is to be obedient to His call.  The rest, He will take care of. You will be in awe of how He works things out!
Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

International Adoption Referral Picture

International Adoption Referral Picture

Before today, I simply haven’t had any new info to post.  Now, however, we have our International Adoption Referral Picture and Video.

I NOW have something to post. We have our referral. We are thrilled. I received it during one of the worst weeks of my life. Wednesday, I left for California. My friend from Finland was home and she wanted to see me…I needed to get away…then again, maybe I didn’t need to getaway. I was a train wreck on the plane. That was a lot of time to remind me of what a horrible person/wife/parent I am. Once I safely landed, I was greeted with my dear friend, her sweet husband, precious baby, and a wonderful mother.

Good Friends

Nothing but smiles and understanding. My friend “briefed” everyone on my situation, so supper was nothing short of how to properly maim men who don’t understand that no means no. Things were okay, tense, not sleeping much, but okay Thursday and then Friday…we got a video of our precious son and pictures to boot. My tears of heartache were transforming into yelps and tears of joy. Everyone in the room was an emotional basket case (I, of course, drug them by their hair to see my sweet son.)

We See Him, We Know Him.

It is official…we have chosen…we have been chosen…we have wonderful people in our lives that have brought us one step closer (you know who you are and thank you again). I have a bit more peace. I’m reminded every day that each delay, each moment there isn’t enough money, with each snafu…it is all ordained by a Big God. He will bring us together in His time and His time only. He sends people from the farthest east and the farthest west to meet the needs of His chosen ones, according to His will. I have to rest in that. He won’t call our family to do something if he hadn’t already ordained how it would all play out.

Once I figure out how to find my picture of my cutie…..I’ll be posting it 🙂 Blessings to all.

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Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

Finally PROGRESS in this Journey

Finally PROGRESS in this Journey

Finally PROGRESS in this Journey

Finally PROGRESS in this Journey.  We are officially in Ethiopia.  Well, not physically.  However, our dossier is hanging out at the American Embassy in Ethiopia.  Next step, by this coming Monday, it will be translated.  After translation, we will get our referral!  One step closer to putting a face with a name.  The most exciting part is that I am one step closer to seeing my son.  Then we wait…again!

International adoption, older child adoption, Ethiopian adoption…none of these things are easy.  The Lord chose this beautiful country.  Actually, I was about 10 years old when that thought entered my heart.  In this Finally PROGRESS post, I am trudging down a dark and narrow path.

A Few Words from the Future on Finally PROGRESS Post

In hindsight, I have come to learn to expect the unexpected.  In rereading this Finally PROGRESS post, it speaks to my heart.  Furthermore, no adoption is alike.  This is the same for people, we are all different.  Things can be going smoothly along and then BAM.  Sadly, for us, that meant a 15-month delay.

Moving On

In the days since this Finally PROGRESS post, I have adopted again.  This time, it was a domestic family adoption. Sadly, it is still considered an older child adoption because he was almost two years old.  Guess what?  This adoption was just as difficult as the previous three.

My Quiver

I hope that my quiver is officially full.  Today (being 2018), I have 7 children.  Three of my kids were born “under the heart” and four were born “in the heart.”  It has been an interesting rollercoaster throughout all these years.  I can say that we have Finally PROGRESS in all aspects of life.

Next stop:  Grandchildren.  I’m not on the fast train to those little humans, but I will welcome them when they come.

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Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

Heavy Heart in the Adoption Process

Heavy Heart in the Adoption Process

Heavy Heart in the Adoption Process

Heavy Heart in the Adoption Process.  Today, as I’m looking through blogs on families who have had their “gotcha” days…..my heart just aches. I’m so thankful to God for uniting these families and giving His precious children to their forever homes.

Pondering

I sit and think “when will I meet *my* son”? The fact is is that I love him, so very much.  How is it possible because I don’t even know him? In my mind, he is here, safe, loved beyond measure, and he was chosen. The reality, he is still in his home country. I pray for his safety, his health, and for him to be loved, but it just isn’t the same as a mama’s love.

Home study

I’ve completed my home study.  Finally, I’ve sent off the final piece of paper for my dossier.  Also, I’ve sent the dossier fee to my agency.  We are still lacking SO much money.  I wonder…where it will come from? Will I have enough or will it be there, when it is needed? Lots of questions and few answers.

Knowledge

I know that God lights my path, but he does it step by step and not miles down the road. It is faith that will carry me through.  Still, I am human and  I still wonder “when and how.”

So Many Questions

Before, there was a level of frustration. I did and redid my dossier. Now I’m done.  I wait and wonder. What fundraiser should I do? Can I get another loan? Will the grants come through? I found myself turning off the blogs.  Sadly, it was almost too much for me to read. Sometimes, I feel bad because, on the one hand, I rejoice and thank God for these reunions.  Yet, on the other hand…it hurts.

I guess the next reunion up is my sister’s! How very exciting to watch another family become whole.

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Foster to Adopt ~ International ~ Intrafamily Adoption

Well not Much to Report

Well not Much to Report

Well not Much to Report

Well not Much to Report.  I’ve had to resend my financials for the 4th (hopefully final) time, I’m waiting on my passports because I have to send in a color copy of each.

When One Forgets

My home study agency had to resend my neglect forms to Frankfort….in the rush to get her precious baby, my worker forgot 🙂 *side note* H H is safe at home with her brother and parents. Praise be to God.

Frustrating

It is slow and frustrating at times. I’ve come to the conclusion that I will be making 2 trips. Short of a miracle (we aren’t ruling that out), B and I will make the first trip (court) together and then I’ll be going back in 6 wks. to pick up little man.

Bright Side

On one hand, what an honor and privilege it will be to see that beautiful country twice. I get to “get the feel of it” first trip and then enjoy the second trip. The sad part is that I get to meet, love on and adore my baby and then I have to give him back. Heart-wrenching. It’ll be okay. I’ll be okay. It’ll be okay 🙂

Grants

Still working on grants, but I can’t get my grant stuff finished because I don’t have a copy of my home study. That is kind of crucial. Fundraising has gone, okay, but it will be much better when I get my matching grant 🙂

God is good, He is faithful. He loves Jude more than I do and He has His hand of protection over him. Thank you, Lord, for your constant provisions!

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