Don’t Quit Just Do It
There are days when I am done. Done. DONE. I’ve had all I can stand and I simply can’t take anymore. I’m good until I’m not. Over the years of struggling with depression, I can typically feel myself sliding down the mountain into the pit. I know my traumaversary dates and in those times, I give myself grace. However, last year slapped me upside the head, held me upside down, shook all my innards out, and left me alone.
It’s amazing how you can be surrounded by people who love you and still feel so unimaginably alone. I think it surprised me that it wasn’t a gentle descension down that mountain. It was more like, you are walking up the mountain, on a treadmill cause I have never reached the top, and all of the sudden I am underneath a heap of rubble with only a penlight and no oxygen. I was trapped, in my own mind, which is not a good thing sometimes.
I wanted to quit but instead of running my mouth, ruining things further, I isolated (not good) but in that isolation, I turned to the Word, praise music, hot showers, laying with my head under the covers, got a therapist (hey, we all need one), and I have consciously remembered to inhale/exhale every single day. Am I better? Yes but not 100% by any stretch.
Will I get better?
Yes because I’m working hard at being vulnerable and transparent. Does this mean I don’t love Jesus and my salvation isn’t real? I’ve been told that. If I loved Jesus more, went to church more, prayed more, read the Word more, I wouldn’t be depressed. Newsflash. I love Jesus. I have a mansion waiting for me in heaven.
We also live in a fallen world where the prince of darkness tries to steal, kill, and destroy people and families. God is bigger. He is bigger now and forever. I have read the last page of the Good Book and guess what? God wins and since I am His and He is mine, I win. You are loved. No matter what anyone says (even if that anyone means you saying it to yourself), you are worthy. You are enough. Please, if you ever feel like you can’t make it another day, reach out to a pastor, counselor, friend, call 911 or better yet, call 988 that is the new suicide prevention hotline and someone answers the phone 24/7. You are worth living!
💛 If you’re navigating life’s hard places and need a safe space to heal, grow, or just breathe—Circle of Hope Counseling Services is here for you.
We offer trauma-informed, faith-filled therapy for individuals, couples, and families.
📞 Reach out today to schedule your first session (KY residents only) or learn more: Circle of Hope Counseling Services.
You don’t have to walk this journey alone. Hope starts here.
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