Faith, My Journey, Scripture

Stop Set Boundaries Say NO

Stop Set Boundaries Say NO

Stop Set Boundaries Say NO

I have to stop.  Set boundaries.  Say NO.  Not to live in fear because fear is a liar.  I am so tired of living under the judgement of others.  Let me just tell you something…oh my word.  I’m fixing to use my words and all of them.  This may not be pretty but sometimes you just have to let it out.

I’m gonna have to take a few minutes and watch a Chopped episode.  My brain is moving faster than my fingers and the emotions are strong.  Let’s just say I am completely and totally over it.  A change is coming and it may take till Jesus returns, but by goodness, I am done!

Let’s Try This Again

I am not a people person.  Yet, I’m empathetic (so I’ve been told) and I have a heart to help others.  Those that are unseen, so to speak.  People that other people snub their noses at because they don’t dress/live/act “appropriately.”  I’m just saying…those are my people.  I see them, I feel them, I understand them.

Their problems, I feel deep within my soul.  The look in their eyes can tell a thousand stories and they are just yearning to tell that story.  They simply want to be loved, accepted, and NOT judged.  I CHOOSE to love, accept, and to not judge them.  Honestly, I want to meet them where they are currently at and walk into their world.  It is an honor to step into their stories.

Hard Realization

What a hard realization that most people, in this world, do not think the same way.  I just don’t get it.  How can you not love and SEE the people around you?  The unseen, the less than, the “you are not in my circle therefore you do not exist” people.

For the love of all that is holy…Jesus’ second greatest commandment is to LOVE OTHERS.  Matthew 22: 36-40 clearly states, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”  Jesus replied:  ” ‘ Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it:  ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

The Things that Have Happened

I cannot and will not go into detail on the struggles we have had this summer.  It has hit me hard that not everyone thinks like I think and love as Jesus says to love.  What they want is to steal, kill, and destroy my joy.  My joy is my family.  They are all I think of and commit too 100% every minute of everyday.

For anyone to presume to know what happens in my home shows their narcissistic personality in full bloom.  The things we have been accused of and the mud we have been drug through is astonishing.  I really thought 2020 couldn’t get worse…it can.  Trust me.

So Much Loss and Pain

The loss and pain was completely preventable.  Let’s try something radical.  If you think something is wrong with a friend or their family…TALK TO THEM.  Ask how you can help them, pray for them with no details, listen to them cry.  Clean their house, run an errand, cook a meal.  Be the hands and feet of Jesus.

Radical, ya think?

Or you could go the other route of gossiping, being deceitful, frightening your children, lie, manipulate.  Just because you might have money with your 2.5 kids and .5 pets…driving your nice cars with your paid off houses, does not mean my family is any less.

We do not deserve the shit you have drug us through.  All you see is a tired mama of many kids who “look” normal.  What you don’t know is what all we have dealt with and lived through.

Outcome

Well, our outcome has been standing on Exodus 14:14 “The Lord will fight your battle.  You simply have to be quiet.”  I was quiet.  Lots of tears, lots of reflection.  There was a period of hiding, a valley of severe depression and anxiety, another medical condition for a child due to the STRESS so called “friends” put us through.  Thank you for that, honestly.  It’s been the most fun.

We have been validated.  Proven to be good, loving parents, found out that our family does not need any outside assistance to thrive.  Honestly, with friends like I have had…who needs enemies?  We have discovered several of our “friends” are simply wolves in sheeps clothing.  Yet, now we know.

Choices Moving Forward

I will not hide.  My children will not hide.  We will parent as we have for 25 years until the Lord calls us home.  I will not be afraid and neither will my children.  When I get my Spirit filled feeling about someone, I will trust it and I will teach my kids what I have learned.  I pray that that type of wisdom and discernment is something the Lord gives them.

Honestly, I knew better with these people, but I wanted to be wrong.  I wanted a friend.  Someone who would listen and love us through it all.  What I got was satan reincarnated and the judgy nature of those people.  When bad things happen, the first person who physically showed up was my mama, my Oak.

My Oak

This woman.  She blew in like a whirlwind.  Then, she ironed out the people, in my house, that needed to be ironed out.  Next, she found me and that hug…I melted into her and I felt her love permeate every single molecule of my body.

She gently walked me upstairs and we both laid down and talked.  I cried and she sat in silence and rubbed my hair like when I was a little girl.  She gave me permission to wallow for a day, but tomorrow I have to get up and wash my face and face the day.  There will be no hiding for her little girl.

She loves me.  Unconditionally.  She sees me.  Truthfully.  She knows all that has happened, yet…she loves the ones who have hurt her baby so deeply.  If I am 1/2 the mama she is when I grow up, my kids will be blessed.  I am blessed by her.

A Few True Friends

We discovered those who would stand by us and those who judge us.  Prayer warriors surrounded us and kept us safe.  We stood before all and God clean and came out on the other side with no truth coming from the claims and lies.

These people may never answer for what they did on this side of heaven, but rest assured…Jesus has it written in His book.  Each of these people will stand before the throne listening to him read their story from beginning to end.  They will answer for it.

For Now

I choose self-care.  Pet a cat (or 12), bake, eat candy, smile more, block people on social media, keep loving on the “less of these” people, wash my hands, wear a mask, parent my kids, love my husband, and love my God.  My enemies cannot hurt me because God goes before me, after me, and stands on each side of me.  If you want me and my family, you must go through Him first.

Good luck to ya.

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Amish Iridologist, Medical

2020 Update on Reuben Schwartz Amish Iridologist

2020 Update on Reuben Schwartz Amish Iridologist

2020 Update on Reuben Schwartz Amish Iridologist

Well, today I decided to write a 2020 Update on Reuben Schwartz Amish Iridologist.  Since he is Amish, he has no access to the outside world.  By that statement, I mean no cellphones, no landlines, no television, computers, ipads, or running water.  Communication is done by mail, word of mouth, and horse/buggy.

So, I decided to call my friends at Mountain Air Herbs and get the skinny on my Amish friend, as well as, the updates on their business.  Can I just say these are the friendliest humans ever?  So kind and so willing to help in any and all matters.  They are not Amish, so they do have access to a telephone.

Let’s Get the Details Out

Number 1:  I DO NOT WORK FOR REUBEN!  There is no way I can make you an appointment.  I can only share with you what we learned while we saw him.  Honestly, I get a lot of emails requesting that I get someone an appointment and I read their stories.  I reply back with this same statement, but I also have the opportunity to encourage and pray for those people.

Number 2:

For an appointment, you MUST WRITE a letter to Reuben requesting a day/time.  If you do not request it, they will just give you the next day/time that is available.  This process takes about 7-10 days.  There really is no need to go into details, as they may not know what the condition is that you have.  They simply look in your eye.  I mean, my son has Opsoclonus Myoclonus Syndrome and most doctors have never seen that in their lifetime.  I’m pretty certain Mr. Reuben had never heard of it.

Side note:  Mountain Air Herbs cannot make appointments for Reuben either.  They cannot relay messages or give any type of advice or consulation as to what Reuben says, so be mindful of that, as well.

Number 3:

He see walk-ins.  Yet, he always gives priority to those with appointments.  He does try his best to see everyone but he also needs to eat and take breaks, occasionally!  Please be kind and respectful.  Take the time you are waiting and sit on the beautiful porch and enjoy the silence and peace.  Go pet a horse, look around his shop and buy some popcorn or bread!

**EDITED TO ADD:  I saw Jake about 2 weeks ago as Mr Reuben has had eye surgery and is not working right now. I was blown away by the things he told me. Make an appointment people, the day I went I did not have one and waited for 5 hours to see Jake. ~ From Michelle Shoemake(r)**

Number 4:

Money.  Reuben does not charge for his assessment, though he does take donations.  He has a box on his desk where you can place cash or change.  His herbs/pills/supplements do cost money.  That amount varies based on what you buy and how much of it you buy.  You do not have to get everything he recommends.  Ask and he will tell you what is important and what you can hold off on until the next visit.

Mountain Air Herbs is down the hill from Reuben.  What he doesn’t have, they will have.  There are some limited supplies due to their suppliers and Co-vid19.  They take cash, card, and checks.  They also have a phone and a restroom if you need it.

Addresses

Reuben Schwartz, Amish Iridologist

1205 Radure Rd.

Hestand, KY  42151

No Phone Number because…Amish and all

 

Mountain Air Herbs

1945 Radure Rd.

Hestand, KY  42151

270.487.1334

Days/Hours of Operation **THIS HAS CHANGED**

Reuben Schwartz

Monday and Friday from 7:30-3

Saturday 7:30-11

 

Mountain Air Herbs

Monday and Friday from 8-4

Saturday 8-12

BREAKING NEWS!

Mr. Reuben is RETIRING at the end of 2020.  It is time for him to hang up his crucible and flashlight and enjoy his porch.  I’m very excited for him.  He has given a lot of himself and it is time for him to relax.  Rest assured, his business will stay open.  His replacement will be Jake Shirk.  He has been helping Reuben for about 16 years or so, so he knows what he is doing and was trained by the best.

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All About Adoption, Family, Kids and Grandkids, Medical

When Your Family is Fractured

When Your Family is Fractured

When Your Family is Fractured

What does one do When Your Family is Fractured?  That has been our current state for a long time.  There have been cracks here and there, but this year, it is different.  I’m not going to lie, it has been a struggle since about 2014, but even before then due to some extenuating circumstances.  I don’t want to discourage anyone from adoption, but there is so much more I know now than I did almost 14 years ago.

What You Need to Know

When people are in the process of adopting a child or children, it is an exciting thing.  We do all the things that are required.  Background checks, money in the bank, fundraisers, fingerprints (if international), and so on.  We work hard on those dossiers.  Our homes are spotless for our homestudy.  We eagerly anticipate our referral or a picture.  There are so many support groups where we get on and talk about our discouragement of NOT getting a referral quick enough.

What We DON’T Realize

Is that we are, quite literally, waiting for a family to fail in someway.  If it is foster care, we are waiting for a family to abuse, neglect, or hurt, a child or children so they will be placed in the system. Then we jump through all the hoops for the next 17 out of 23 mths and wait for the termination of parental rights.

Or, if it is a newborn, we are waiting for a sweet birthmom to make the most difficult decision of her life.  For her life to be altered…forever…by choosing the blessing of adoption.  If international, we are waiting for a birth parent who may be dying, or the child is starving, or some other tragedy that places them in an orphanage.

When you are adopting a family members child, you are waiting for drugs, alcohol, abuse, neglect, or abandonment to happen.  There are other circumstances, as well, but that was my circumstance for my son.  You start looking at YOUR sister and think…she is my son’s aunt?  Grandmother?  Both?

The Dark Side

We are walking into the blackest chapter of our children’s lives.  Our greatest joy and what we worked so hard for, comes at our children’s greatest loss.  Whether they are an infant or an older child, that loss will forever be imbedded in their brain and heart.  They are the only ones who have heard their mother’s heartbeat from the inside out and your heart is just not the same.

My heart literally aches because in a perfect world, my kids would still be with their birth families.  Succeeding, thriving, living, loving…yet because of certain things, they are not there…they are with me.  I am grateful.  Indebted.  Forever changed because they grew in my heart and not under it!

Yet…they will always wonder what it would have been like to have been raised by their birthparents or in their birth country.  Try explaining all of the things when they are older.  It’s super fun aka traumatic.

Getting It Straight

I do not regret any of my children.  None of them.  They are my joy and I’m so thankful to God that He wove my family together in such a beautiful and intricate way.

But

Trauma is a bitch.  Plain and simple.  It is a straight-up bitch.  Talk to ANY adoptive parent and they will tell you the same thing.  Trauma can come in all shapes and sizes.  It can come with a list of diagnoses…then there is “traumaversary”  That leads to sabotage of all good things, behavior issues, confabulations, deceit, manipulation, and so much more.

My Family is No Different

We have, and continue to have, all of the above things and the “so much more” times a million.  What started as one child exhibiting out of control behaviors due to FASD, PTSD, RAD, blah blah blah trickled down to other children.  Another child exhibiting similar, yet different behaviors. Then, a third child going above and beyond.  Lastly, the fourth child who struggles with anxiety and more.

It has wreaked havoc on my person, my husband, other children, even my pets will lose hair when life is escalated in my home.  This usually occurs November-March and then in July-October…which as I look at that typed out, it is from October-July.  That gives us 2 mths trauma free.

All the Things We Have Tried

We have done the things.  Doctors, specialists, therapists, counselors, pastors, family, medication, routines, no routines, homeschool, private, public…All.  The.  Things.  One child, nothing has worked for that child.  Another child, we hope is in the process of healing.  The third child is amped up right now.  The fourth child, we just deal with it day by day.

I am exhausted.  My husband is exhausted.  Honestly, even the kids are exhausted. Mix all this crap in with a pandemic and being in this house and you have Funville.  My underwear drawer no longer holds underwear.  It is stocked FULL of candy.  I wake up, in the morning, with a bag of snickers under my arm and wrappers everywhere.

There is a new found love of Limeade Slushes.  My teeth are going to rot out of my head.  I have become a human GPS because I take LONG drives on roads I have never heard of.  My favorite pasttime is driving to my neighbors and seeing if their pig is in the front yard.  I cry…alot.

Falling Apart

Sadly, I feel like my family is falling apart.  That Scripture of satan lurking around the corner to devour my family, it is happening!  Honestly, at warp speed.  I have so many words and so much has happend that my fingers will not move as fast as my brain.

Praying that this pandemic ends.  I am praying for healing for my medically fragile children.  Salvation for two of my kids.  Wisdom with all of them.  Healthy delivery for one (gonna be a granny!)  A healthy relationship for two kids.  School to open for one.  One to come home safely.  Another to stop making REALLY poor and dangerous choices.

I want my family to heal.  To be whole.  For God to intervene and DO SOMETHING.  Honestly, I am just ready for Jesus to come riding down on His white horse and take us all home.  Home…where there is no sadness, no darkness, and no pain.  Just glory.

God is Bigger

I just have to trust in that…right?  Right.  Yes, trust.  The hardest thing for me to do is trust Him with my family.  Maybe that, alone, needs to be my prayer.  Lord, let me trust in You that You have plans to prosper and not harm my family.

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Family, Guest Blogger

Healing Through Anger

Healing Through Anger

Healing Through Anger

In this piece, my guest blogger talks about how she is healing through anger.  Anger is a valid emotion, as Jesus was angry when He turned over the tables in the temple.  Anger is secondary to fear and/or sadness.  In this piece, you can see her fear, clearly.  Also, you can feel her sadness.  Please pray for this young girl as you think of it.

I Am So Angry With You

I know I have said it a million times, but I am so angry with you. If I were in the business of hating people, you would be first on my list. The thought of you makes my blood pressure skyrocket. Why couldn’t you be a normal stepfather? Seriously, why did you have to abuse me? Why me? I was a child. What kind of man likes children?

I wish my mom would have never met you. Honestly, I wish I did not blame myself for what you did. I know I was young, and I know it was not my fault. Its yours. You are the one who abused me not the other way around.

Tell the Truth

I have had a few opportunities to tell you the truth, to say whatever I wanted to you, but I did not. Part of me wishes I would not have been such a coward. I want you to know how much you hurt me. The other part of me knows that it would not matter what I said you would not care. You would enjoy the attention, you always like all the attention being on you.

What I Want to SCREAM

I want to scream at you and tell you that you hurt me. To tell you that you traumatized me. I want to tell you how I cannot even change clothes in the comfort of my own home without feeling uncomfortable or like I am being watched. To yell that you took my childhood and my innocence away from me. That is something I will never get back. I cannot go back and act like a child again. Not all of that is your fault, but a big piece of it is.

I am never a violent person, but I would like to punch you in the face a few good times. I bet that would help me release some of my anger. That sure would make me feel better. I do not understand how you can have like four different types of cancers, and still be alive. I guess that is just how my life goes.

Papa T is Crossing the Line

I heard a phrase today that I had not heard in a long time. A phrase that makes me nauseous. “Daddy T” I never understood why you made us call you that. Mom does not understand why that name makes me uncomfortable, and to be honest I don’t completely understand it myself. All I know is the name makes me physically sick. My sister told me today that you want her daughter to call you “Papa T” And it incited some rage in me.

Yet, That Baby is Safe From You

Luckily that baby lives far away now so you cannot get your hands on her. If she were still around, I can promise you that you would never meet her. I would go to jail before that happened and I would be okay with it. You will never get the satisfaction of her calling you “papa T” which I feel is WAY too close to “Daddy T”

You will never get the satisfaction to take that baby’s innocence away from her, and that brings me just a little bit of you. Your abuse ended with me, and I will do everything in my power to make sure it goes no further.

Working on Forgiveness

I know it does not sound like it, but I truly am trying to forgive you. It is just a slow process. The thing is, I am not forgiving you for you. I am doing this for me. To heal. I am doing it so I can put you in the past and finally move on. To better myself and be the best person I can be. I know in the end you will get what you deserve, and I will not even have to lift a finger.

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My Dearest Brother Z

(1-800) 422-4453

Family, Guest Blogger

Three Things Said Could Make You Hate Me

Guest Blogger

In this piece, Three Things Said Could Make You Hate Me, my guest blogger begins to outline her life when she was younger.  What a powerful voice she has, yet still too scared to let it out loudly.  Time and Jesus will cure that.  I’m so proud of her and all that she has been doing to heal.

Three Things Said Could Make You Hate Me

 

A Born Fixer

Every since I was a little girl all I ever wanted to do was please you and to help you. All I have done my whole life is what you needed. You needed someone to bathe a kid, I did it, you needed someone to help feed a kid, I did it, you needed someone to complain to, that was me.

I grew up listening to everything wrong in your life, your husband or ex-husband drama, your “my kids hate me”, my kids are terrible, my kids don’t love me. Did you forget I was your kid too? Or am I just an ear to listen and a body to help work. You’ve definitely groomed me well for the job I would like to have one day. If anything I am a listener and I like to help others to the best of my ability. So at least there is a positive within all the negativity I have listened to and experienced during my life.

This Thing Called Life

My life has been a series of what does mom need me to do next? What does my youngest brother need? Or even what can I help other brother with? He may have had most of the attention from you growing up but that also meant that he got the attention from the men in your life too. So there was a lot of negative things going on in his life as well. As much as I don’t like him I do love him so I didn’t like to see him so upset.

You have complained to me so many times about so many different things that it makes me scared to share anything good or bad with you because I am afraid it will upset you. I feel like if I tell you some things you’ll stop caring, stop loving me. In fact somethings I would rather just bottle up or ignore because I know that you wouldn’t approve or would hurt your feelings.

What About Me and My Feelings

Like sometimes I want to point out that I have feelings too and I’m tired of having only one way conversations about you and your kids like I’m not one of them. I know you don’t mean anything by it towards me but it still hurts me. Especially when you say we are all unmotivated kids that’s don’t care about you. Maybe not in that order but they have both been said. I am motivated, I work, I’m trying to move out, I do love you. Stop putting us all together like we are all the same.

One day I would like to have a conversation with you about me. About my life, and about things that I am learning about myself. Like I remembered what it was like to be motivated to finish something. Sure its just a sweater but to me that is an accomplishment. To be able to wear something that I made. Just because its not interesting to you doesn’t mean its not important.

My Dreams

The same with schooling, just because it’s not what you want me to do doesn’t mean that its not something I can do. I want to work in the psychology field with kids. But that’s not good enough for you. You want me to be able to support myself and I get that but why can’t you support me in my decision on what I want to do it just might take me a while to get there.

The Truth About My Engagement

I would love to be able to sit down and talk with you about why I truly didn’t get married. How it was a lie to begin with sure it wasn’t intentional but a lie none the less. I would like to tell you that I have recently learned that I am not interested in men but more confused than anything. I’d like to have your support while I try to figure everything out all the way. But you’d disown me for that thought or try to shame me out of it.

I have listened to everything you have had to say about everything and everyone. I have supported you through good and bad decisions. In short I have loved you and accepted you as you are. But you would not do the same for me I am sure. You would just hear the words and then you’d be done. Done with me and done with everything else because without me who will you talk to?

Three Things Said Could Make You Hate Me

Without me who will help you when your down? Without me who will help pick up the pieces that are left and glue them back together when anger or sadness strikes?

I love you and I worry about you more than I worry about anything or anyone else. So me keeping this one thing from you. Keeping it under lock and key may hurt me but at least I know you’ll be okay. Cause ill still help you. The sad thing is there’s not anything you could do to make me stop loving you but just three could make you hate me.

Thankful

Today, I am thankful for the bravery of this young lady.  She certainly has powerful emotion behind her words.  Also, she is using them to help her sort through the muddy water.  She is loved and a treasure.  May she be blessed in her courage and continue to speak for those who do not have a voice.

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Dearest Nana

CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway

Business Side of Life

CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway

CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway

CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway

This CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway is absolutely stunning.  Plus, it smells good 🙂  I love things that smell good.  My kids asked me if I was going to read it or sniff it.  I choose to do both.  Honestly, I do not know what it is about a new Bible, but it makes me want to dive in.

This year has been a struggle for everyone on the planet.  So much uncertainty, pain, confusion, and fear.  Our family has had a lot of “hits” so to speak.  It has almost taken the starch right out of me, as my Granny would say.  Yet, the Lord says in His Word that Fear is a Liar.

I want to dive back in and learn how I can overcome fear and worry.  What a great way to start with a brand new, beautifully illustrated Bible!  To win, please like or comment on any of my social media posts (or this one) and it will enter you to win.  Please do so by, my birthday, November 13, 2020!  Good luck.

OVERVIEW

Product category: Bible
Title: CSB Holy Land Illustrated Bible
Campaign focus: Be visually immersed in the setting of God’s redemptive story
Publisher: Lifeway Christian Resources
Publish date: 9/15/20
Bible Translation: Christian Standard Bible (CSB)

ABOUT

The CSB Holy Land Illustrated Bible is a visually immersive Bible reading experience featuring over 1,200 images, maps, and illustrations to provide greater insight and understanding of the people, places, and events of scripture. Book-specific introductions provide the setting and circumstances of writing for each book, and every image includes a descriptive caption to help better understand what is pictured.

CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway CSB Holy Land Bible Review and Giveaway

Features include:

  • 1,200+ images, maps, and illustrations
  • 275 full-length commentary articles
  • 40+ “Digging Deeper” call-outs

By clicking on “Bible” you will find a link to a sampling of this beautiful book.  Also, HERE is the Table of Contents, if you are interested.  If you would like to see an OVERVIEW of this Bible, be sure and click on the link provided.

Social Media Links

Website

Facebook

Instagram

Twitter

Business Side of Life, Guest Blogger

Tips for Meeting Your Kids’ Needs as they Grow

My guest blogger, Alex Robbins, talks about Tips for Meeting Your Kids’ Emotional, Physical and Educational Needs as they Grow.  Funny he should send this to me at this particular time.  Tonight, as I was sitting in my son’s hospital room, we had a “Comin’ to Jesus” meeting about our emotional, physical, and educational needs.  He is 14 now and you can imagine how that conversation went.  Please, talk to your kids!

Tips for Meeting Your Kids’ Emotional, Physical and

Educational Needs as they Grow

 

Tips for Meeting Your Kids’ Needs as they Grow

Meeting all of your kids’ needs takes a lot of work. As a parent, your child’s emotional, physical, and educational needs are just a few of the things you have to focus on. Below, we’ve put together some great tips and resources for each of these areas in your kids’ lives.

Talking with Kids About Feelings

Discussing emotions and feelings can prove difficult at any age. However, it’s important to begin this dialogue with your child at an early age.

Unique Ways to Meet the Emotional Needs of Your Child

Helping Kids Identify and Express Feelings

Feelings Activities and Fun Ideas for Kids

Understanding Your Teen’s Emotional Health

Kids Feeling Blue: 5 Ways to Get them Talking

Helping Your Kids Be Active

It’s easy to let your kids sit inside and stare at screens all day. However, you need to encourage kids to spend some time getting active, especially in the sunshine and fresh air.

How Much Physical Activity Do Children Need?

Couch Potatoes Start Early: How to Get Kids Moving

Children, Sports, and Exercise: Choices for All Ages

How to Encourage Free Play

How to Limit Your Child’s Screen Time

Meeting Educational Needs

Although you can work with your child’s school to help maximize their education, you can also do many things at home to boost their learning.

Encourage Your Kids to Try Storm Spotting

Online Lesson Plans for Teachers and Parents

Parent-Teacher Conference Tips for Parents

{7} Surefire Ways to Make Your Kid a Better Student

7 Tips for Helping Your Child with Math at Home (When You Hate Math)

Parents: 8 Ways to Help Your Teen Make a College Decision

Helping your kids be active, express their feelings, and do well in school is just a small part of the puzzle when it comes to being a parent. However, by focusing on areas like these, you can help your kids grow into adulthood with everything they need in their toolbox.

Check out the blog at Barefoot Faith Journey for more family and parenting posts.

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Ending the Stigma of Mental Illness

Ending the Stigma of Mental Illness

In Ending the Stigma of Mental Illness, my guest blogger shares her thoughts on this subject.  I have a mental disorder that can be crippling at times. When I say crippling I mean I cannot get myself out of the bed. I have thoughts in my head on a continuous loop that should not be there to begin with. Those days when I don’t call, text. or even speak to people.  Hell, I don’t even come out of my room. When I say I can’t get myself out of the bed, I mean, I literally will stay in it for days.  I will only leave to go to the bathroom or to eat.

The “Happy” Place

There are also days when I am “happy” these are the days when I can really get myself into trouble. when I talk ninety to nothing and spend all of my money in one place. Or I could get in the car and just drive in one direction not knowing where I am going but going anywhere is better than where I am. These are the days when I bombard all of my friends that I haven’t talked to in days that I want to do something. On these days I don’t sleep, I could be up for days at a time and it wouldn’t bother me one bit. I make poor choices when I am like this.

This is bipolar disorder in a nutshell, at least in my case.

I am tired of the stigma on mental illness or mental health in general. If you have asthma, everyone can tell by the physical complications that you have. However when it comes to mental illnesses we dare not speak of them . They don’t exist to people who don’t have them or at least they perceive it as a negative.

You don’t see people not talking to people with asthma so why shouldn’t they for people with mental illness. Honestly, I should feel free to share that I have bipolar disorder without having people think that it means I’m crazy. Furthermore, I shouldn’t have to own that lie but yet here I am pretending it doesn’t exist or calling myself crazy.

I am tired of comparing myself to “normal” people.

What does that mean anyways? To be “normal”. The definition of normal is conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected. So what I’m seeing is that everyone is suppose to be the same, act the same, and do the same things the exact same way? Maybe I’m looking at it in a negative way but it sounds to me like the normal people are no where to be seen. Because no one is the same no one is conformed to the same standards.

So why do we make ourselves feel less than just because of a mental illness. Bipolar disorder is my normal just because it isn’t yours doesn’t mean that you have the right to tell me that I am wrong, not to be trusted, or a danger because of it.

Thankful

Today, I am thankful for modern medicine.  It has helped me look at life a bit more clear.  God is bigger than all, but He created man to create medicine to help.  Never feel weak because you need a medication to help you even things out.  You are not weak!  Honestly, you are brave and strong.

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Family, Guest Blogger

From the Outside Looking In my Family

From the Outside Looking In my Family

From the Outside Looking In my Family

From the Outside Looking In {my family}

We were a happy family

{We} went to church

We spent time with other people

{We} went places together

 

But what you don’t see

Is the mother that can’t get out of bed

Or the stepfather that won’t help feed the kids

And the nine year old raising her younger brothers.

 

All that is seen is what they want you to see

Happy, healthy children

Children that spends time with other kids

And parents that provide the best they can

 

Truly my parents did try the best they could

But sometimes that’s not enough

Sometimes the best is not good or bad just effort

On the days that everyone was happy

Everything was fine

 

But those days when the yelling was too hard to bear

Or the throwing of things was upsetting to hear

Those are the days that stick with children

 

Having a stepfather that could care less

Or can’t stand to look at you because you’re not his

Or maybe because of jealousy of the bond a mother has with her kids

 

That is hard

And then there are the days

When your mother can’t get out of bed

Because she has massive depression

Not that you understand because yet again you are nine

 

Those days are the days that are the hardest

Because you’re alone in the house

And in charge of the kids

Who are five and one

 

Don’t get me wrong I love those kids

And I would do anything for them still

But there is so much one child can do

And somethings are just too much responsibility

 

And even though no one knew what waws going on

Or maybe no one was observant enough to see

Either way I choose to believe that it all happened for a reason

And I would still choose to help even though it took away my childhood

At least they got to keep theirs

Thankful

Today, I am thankful for this young lady.  She is a beautiful human who is loved tremendously.  I am so proud of her journey and watching her grow and heal.

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Guest Blogger

My Dearest Brother Z

My Dearest Brother Z

In My Dearest Brother Z, my guest blogger goes through her emotions of losing her brother at a very young age.  The loss of a sibling is devastating to the other children, as well as, the parents.  It is unimaginable pain that lingers for so very long.

My Dearest Brother Z

Dear Z,

A kid my age who I knew from school came in, and he reminds me so much of you. He has something wrong with him medically and he walks just like you did when you got sick. I saw him, and that made a bad day worse. Seriously, I wanted to give him a big hug. Then, I wanted to crawl under the register and cry. I miss you so much, It has been five years, I can’t believe it. You deserve to be here bub. I believe that you would be married with a family now.  You would a good dad.

Honest Prayer

I prayed to God every night for years that it was me instead of you. Honestly, I prayed that I could take all your pain away. I wanted to make you better and I couldn’t. That seems to be a recurring theme in my life. I make jokes about you being dead, but that’s how I cope with you being gone.

I’m sorry we left you with mom. I’m sorry I didn’t stay with you for that last year. I would have went through whatever Tim threw at me, just to be with you that last year. Mom told me about how you asked for me every day after your seizure, and that story hurts my heart. She told me all about how you thought you saw me running around the foot of your bed every night before you went to bed. I am sorry I wasn’t there for that. I wish I was actually there to be running around your bed.

Life isn’t the same without you. I miss your voice, hugs, and I miss you yelling at me when I tried to help you walk. Honestly, I just miss you dude. You were a light to anyone who knew you, and I miss your presence.

Thankful

Today, I am thankful for the beginning of healing.  Honestly, awareness of where healing needs to happen and the knowledge of the route that needs to be taken in order to walk through the pain that leads to healing.

 

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