Tag: comparison

End the Stigma, Faith Journey, Quotes

True Beauty from Within the Ashes

Brandi C

True Beauty from Within the Ashes

True Beauty from Within the Ashes

“True Beauty”

Do You think that a California girl is supposed to have curls and wear a jean size 3?
All the curves in all the right places, spray tanned faces like on TV?
And we read in the gospel of Vogue that we’re all supposed to dress and move and be
Visions of perfection
Such a misconception
‘Cause the real connection is deeper than the eye can see

True Beauty from Within the Ashes reminds me of a post I wrote about the little squares of life. Social media often becomes a tool for comparison, but what we see is just a curated snapshot. People carefully choose what they present to the world, but what’s hidden behind the screen—the chaos, the struggles, the unfiltered moments—remains unseen.

Chorus

What’s inside of you
What’s inside of me
The hands that made the moon and the stars
The mountains and the seas
Made you wonderful, beautiful, marvelously
Let the whole world see your
True beauty

Aw, Psalm 139, about how God created us.  If you haven’t read it, you should!

World Versus Truth

Don’t know much about Dolce and Gabbana
Seems like a lot of drama to me
And you can keep all your red high heels
And open-toed shoes – I’m good in my bare feet
Lets get down to the nitty gritty
Enough sex and the city
What about purity?
Skin is just the surface
The passion and the purpose that’s burning down inside us
Is really what we need to see

Purity is a rare treasure these days—how sad is that? It’s so easy to slip when emotions take over, even when you’re with the person you plan to spend forever with. Feelings are natural, but wisdom is essential. Staying accountable and avoiding situations where temptation can take root can prevent a lot of heartache—even if you’re engaged!

Chorus

What’s inside of you
What’s inside of me
The hands that made the moon and the stars
The mountains and the seas
Made you wonderful, beautiful, marvelously
Let the whole world see your
True beauty

Love and Peace

Doesn’t come in a bottle, doesn’t come in a box
You can’t spray it on, you can’t wash it off
You can’t nip and tuck, you can’t sew it up
So don’t waste your time
It’s the love in your heart, the peace in your soul
The hope in your smile lets the whole world know
This little light – you gotta let it shine

Love, peace, hope, a smile, and a shining spirit are so important to keep in our hearts. Yet, they can be difficult to hold onto—especially for those struggling with mental illness. The truth is, we all need to be intentional about cultivating these qualities. Maybe it’s as simple as leaving sticky note reminders to keep them at the forefront of our minds.

True Beauty from Within the Ashes

I hadn’t heard True Beauty in years. When the album first came out, I bought it and listened to it faithfully. But as life happened, things got misplaced along the way.

Recently, while updating my Worship playlist on YouTube, I searched for Shackles—a song I love, also by Mandisa. That’s when True Beauty popped up, leading me back to the entire album.

Feeling inspired while working on my blog, I decided to listen. The moment this song played, it was like warm water washing over me. It speaks to me now in a way it never did when it was first released—deeper, more personal, as if I was meant to hear it in this season of life.

Events of Today

Today, I had the privilege of ministering to a heartbroken young woman. We talked about beauty from ashes—Isaiah 61:3, one of my favorite verses. Her voice has been stifled for so long, silenced by the weight of her past abuse and the uncertainty of what lies ahead. In her eyes, she is broken.

We spoke about how the Lord has a purpose for both her past and present pain. One day, she will find the strength to use her story to help others. She will hold the hand of another, walking them through the ashes, guiding them toward their own beauty.

Encouragement

I hope you find encouragement in knowing that you are never alone. You are loved beyond measure. No matter your past, present, or future circumstances, God loves you right where you are. There is nothing you need to do to earn His love, and nothing you can do to lose it. His love is constant—yesterday, today, tomorrow, and every day until He calls you home.

 

Faith in Hard Places. Healing in Real Life.

The Little Squares of Life

Brandi C

The Little Squares of Life

The Little Squares of Life

In The Little Squares of Life, what do you see? I see skinny people with flawless makeup (the women anyway). Also, I see homemade meals and clean, organized houses. Pets can speak three languages and never need walking because they can use the toilet. Little humans wearing matching clothes never shed a tear or throw a royal fit. They are always smiling with their perfectly cut hair.

What I See

I see manicured yards, ideally educated children. These children speak the same languages as their pets plus one more for fun. They are involved in 25 sports each and excel at each mark. People who love Jesus are the world’s holy ones. They are most certainly blessed with new cars, new houses, and health. Everyone seems to be healthy. Happy, all photos are of happy people.

What a delusion!

Behind The Little Squares of Life is the reality. Marriages falling apart behind the smiles. Kids with dirt under their fingernails and enough earwax to make a candle. Sickness behind the smiles, whether that is life-altering illnesses or mental illnesses and anything in between. It could be a chronic thing or a thing they are too embarrassed to see a doctor for. In that scenario, they are too ashamed to go and ask because they are afraid of what they will find. Taking that further, they are so scared nothing is wrong, and they have embarrassed themselves in front of their doctor and now have a bill to pay.

Reality

Burnt dinners, mailboxes with something green growing on them. Weeds are hidden amongst the hostas. Addictions, hatefulness, and spikes in anger run rampant—people who are broken and tired because of a wayward child. Adult children are now turning into the parents of their parents who are sick.

Green for a Reason

Yes, a beautiful green yard can be seen from across the way. Lush green grass that looks like it is taunting you to come across the street and walk barefoot through it. You don’t realize that as you take your shoes off and tiptoe in the neighbor’s yard, you suddenly feel the truth. That lush green grass is lush for a reason. They have a septic issue, and you are walking through feces water.

Good times.

When are we going to start living in the reality of life? Why do we (I) continue to compare ourselves to others when I know the story behind the picture. I get so tired of this little game that may be in my head.

Take a Moment

Behind every picture is pain a lot of times. The one who loves her pets more than the typical person may be the one who struggles with infertility. There is the one that smiles through daily death or near-death experiences due to a calling of her life. One is always smiling with her children, yet divorce is on the horizon due to addiction.

Every picture is different.

Also, every person is different. Do not ever assume something based on a snapshot. Please, for love, do not judge those who think he/she should “know” better. Someone who “should not have” adopted children. Thoughts on if a person is too overweight or underweight.

People hide their pain behind humor and smiles.

They want you to think about all the good things about them because they are hurting so deeply. If you get too close, you will smell fear on them or pain. Then the questions come that they may or may not know the answer to.

You Can Help

Ask someone (a friend, family, acquaintance, or a stranger) how their day is BUT mean it. Maybe they will be honest with you, from that point on, pra for them. Now, don’t just say you will pray for them. Honestly, most people say that, and they never do it. You can be different. Lay your hands on them and pray for them. Send them off with a smile.

Ask how you can help. Do they need children’s care? A meal or a ride? Is there some spot where you can be the hands and feet of Jesus for that person? Send them Scripture through text or FB message. Take the sin out of social media and interject Jesus all over it!

 

Faith in Hard Places. Healing in Real Life.

Fat Girls and Field Mice

Brandi C

Fat Girls and Field Mice

Fat Girls and Field Mice

Let’s pretend you’re a fly on the wall and I’m going to tell you a story of Fat Girls and Field Mice.

It’s around midnight, and I’m heading to bed when I have a sweet little thought. I say to myself, “Self, you should grab a note from your love notebook and sneak it into Big Daddy’s lunchbox. Give the man a thrill in the middle of his workday.” Cute, right?

So, after I’ve already been upstairs and snuggled under the covers, I decide to get up and do just that.

Trying to Be Sneaky

I grab a love note and quietly tiptoe downstairs. Now, I’m convinced Big Daddy can hear a pin drop from across the house—even with three fans on and the bedroom door shut. So I’m being extra sneaky.

I get to the kitchen and realize his lunchbox is in the pantry. No big deal. I open the pantry door, and out of nowhere, a mouse runs over my foot.

Yep. A. Mouse.

She didn’t even flinch. That thing was already wearing an apron and making herself at home. I tried to negotiate, but she was settled in.

Things I Do Not Do

Now listen, I’m a woman of many talents, but there are three things I do not do:

  1. Boats

  2. Touch raw chicken

  3. Mice

So, what does this grown woman do? I grab my boobs and start jumping up and down like a middle schooler at a boy band concert. Then I freeze, completely still, and ask myself, “Is this warm feeling from the fireplace, or did I just pee?” Thankfully, it was the fireplace.

I tiptoe into the dining room, grab the giant dog bed, and wedge it in front of the pantry door to trap the mouse. Mission “contain the rodent” activated.

Sound the Alarm

I rush back upstairs, no longer quiet. I’m practically levitating in front of Big Daddy, squealing about the Montana-sized mouse in our pantry—right next to my Coke stash, mind you. I tell him he must do something. My nerves are shot, I’m sweating in all the wrong places, and I’m about one anxious toot away from a sonic boom.

Big Daddy finally rolls out of bed (think John Wayne meets grumpy bear), grabs glue traps, and prepares for battle.

Supportive Wife Mode: Activated

Meanwhile, I’m standing on a dining room chair, shouting encouraging statements like:

  • “I love you!”

  • “You’re amazing!”

  • “Focus!”

  • “It’ll eat your feet!”

  • “I’ll go get a cat!”

He was thrilled. Couldn’t you just feel the love?

Get a Cat

Glue traps weren’t working. So Big Daddy says, “Get a cat.” Music to my ears.

I run outside—barefoot, in my drawers—and yell for our cats. Martha comes first. I scoop her up and toss her to Big Daddy like a furry grenade. He throws her into the pantry and shuts the door.

Funniest Scene Ever

Every time he cracked the pantry door to check progress, Martha bolted out like she was screaming, “SANCTUARY!” She wanted no part of this rodent rodeo. After several failed attempts, I let her go.

Next up: Starr. She’s not the friendliest feline, but I figured her attitude might be the secret weapon. Same process, same result. Open door, toss cat, close door, pity crack the door open, and whoosh—Starr escapes with a hiss.

The Final Attempt

While I’m still perched like a sweaty gargoyle on the chair, Big Daddy makes one last attempt. He tosses the cat in, shuts the door, and then—bam—the mouse darts out. Big Daddy does a jig, I scream like I’m being chased by a clown, and Starr wants nothing to do with us.

The mouse heads straight under the cabinet. Starr exits stage left with her tail puffed and pride bruised. Big Daddy glares at me and blames me for scaring the mouse. Seriously?

So Much for Romance

I told him, “My plan was to be sweet and seductive and sneak a love note into your lunchbox. Now you’ll just have to deal with granny panties and leg hair long enough to braid. I’m done.”

As I finally calmed down and got back into bed, he mutters, “You know, mice can climb stairs and squeeze under doors. She might end up in bed with us.”

Sweet dreams, right?

The mouse is still out there. Probably redecorating behind my cabinets. First the pig, now the mouse—we’ve been outsmarted twice in a week. Is this just me, or do normal people go through this?

Also—where are my nephews and their homemade blow-darts when you need them?

Sigh.

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