Tag: breaking the silence

Circle of Hope Counseling Services, End the Stigma, Suicide Awareness and Prevention

Breaking Generational Silence

Brandi Crum, MA, LMFT

Breaking Generational Silence

Suicide, Secrets, and the Stories We’re Finally Telling

For generations, suicide has been treated like a shadow. It is a whispered tragedy, hidden behind closed doors, wrapped in shame, and carried in silence. Families didn’t talk about it. Churches avoided it. Communities swept it under the rug. And so the pain grew heavier, passed down quietly from one generation to the next.

But silence is not the same as healing.

When we choose not to speak about suicide, we don’t protect our loved ones. We isolate them. We send the message that their pain is too much, too taboo, too dangerous to name. And yet, the truth is that suicide has touched far more families than we realize. It isn’t just a distant statistic; it is a reality that has impacted neighbors, classmates, colleagues, and maybe even our own families.

The Cost of Silence

Cultural and generational silence doesn’t just keep us from telling the truth about what happened. It also keeps us from telling the truth about how we’re hurting. People grow up believing that grief must be hidden. That questions must remain unanswered. That shame is more powerful than love. And in that silence, wounds go unhealed, and cycles of pain continue.

The Power of Breaking the Silence

Something shifts when we begin to speak. When families bravely say, “Yes, suicide has touched our lives,” not with shame, but with compassion, we create space for honesty. We give others permission to tell their stories. We begin to dismantle the stigma that keeps people suffering in the dark.

Sharing our stories doesn’t dishonor those we’ve lost. It honors them. It says their lives mattered enough to be remembered, and their struggles mattered enough to be named.

Why It’s Time to Speak Up

Our culture is beginning to recognize that silence has not protected us. It has hurt us. And the only way forward is through truth-telling, compassion, and connection. When we speak about suicide openly, we shine light into the places where shame once lived. We remind one another that none of us are truly alone in our struggles.

The stories we’re finally telling are not just about loss. They’re about love. About hope. About creating a future where talking about mental health is as natural as talking about physical health. A future where the next generation doesn’t inherit our silence, but instead inherits our courage to speak.

If you’re carrying a story that feels too heavy to share, know this: you don’t have to speak it all at once, and you don’t have to speak it alone. But your voice matters. Your story matters. And telling it just might be the key to breaking the silence for someone else.

Call or text 988. You are not alone.

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Circle of Hope Counseling Services, End the Stigma, Faith Journey

Mental Illness and Ending the Stigma

Brandi C

Mental Illness and Ending the Stigma

Mental Illness and Ending the Stigma

Mental Illness and Ending the Stigma. I am also not embarrassed to talk about my mental health journey. I have struggled with it since…well, for as long as I can remember. Does that mean I had a horrible childhood? Nope, quite the opposite. Does that mean I don’t love Jesus? Nope, I have a very strong relationship. It means I have a story.

I sometimes use my story, parts of it, to help others because I never want anyone to feel alone. You need to know that God sees you and captures every tear you cry (Psalm 56:8). With Him, you are not alone. You are enough, you are worthy, and you are loved by the King of Kings.

💛 If you’re navigating life’s hard places and need a safe space to heal, grow, or just breathe—Circle of Hope Counseling Services is here for you.

We offer trauma-informed, faith-filled therapy for individuals, couples, and families.

📞 Reach out today to schedule your first session (KY residents only) or learn more: Circle of Hope Counseling Services.

You don’t have to walk this journey alone. Hope starts here.

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Circle of Hope Counseling Services, End the Stigma, Guest Blogger, Suicide Awareness and Prevention

This is When It Began

Brandi C

This is When It Began

In This is When It Began, this sweet girl reflects on her father and the beginning of her abuse. It is so painful for me to read, yet I know it will be healing. As I have said before, you must walk through the pain before healing. That is precisely what she is doing.

I Remember When

I remember the days when we would sit on the couch and watch tv or work on my homework together,

The days when I was the one you cared for, the apple of your eye, so to speak.

I remember us taking four-wheeler rides through our land back when we were still a single-family.

Back before the war between the parents where the kids had to choose sides

Where the kids had to learn who would do what.

Relearning Life

This was before the manipulation and the lies from both sides.

I wish we could have the same relationship as we did then.

When you were the one I cared for the most

But then it happened.

You Left.

You should have tried harder.

You should have at least fought for your family

but you gave in and moved out.

This is When it Began.

Mom found a new man.

We stayed with our grandparents most of the time.

This is where the abuse began.

The man who was supposed to be an uncle

turned out to be a child abuser.

As I stayed in silence, he became your friend

and this is how it came down in the end.

You Did Nothing but Sit

You didn’t try to do anything.

Instead, you said you knew people inside.

This was probably a lie.

Which are you didn’t care what had happened

or at least you didn’t care enough.

If you did, you would have done something. Anything would have been enough.

Enough to Show that You Cared for Me

Anything at all would have sufficed.

Years later, I still hold you at fault whether I should or not.

I just wish you had seen what was going on.

I mean, there were signs.

But I Can’t Blame You for Someone Else’s Decisions.

Just for yours at that was to do nothing.

Yes, I’m still mad and still sad.

And I know I should forgive you for this one thing.

But I just can’t until I understand why.

Resources

If you or someone you know is being abused, PLEASE reach out.

ChildHelp Hotline

National Domestic Violence Hotline

Suicide Prevention Lifeline

 

Circle of Hope Counseling Services, End the Stigma, Guest Blogger, Suicide Awareness and Prevention

My Story Will Empower Me

Brandi C

My Story Will Empower Me

Highlighting Stories of Survivors

In this story, you will read about abuse by a stepfather to his stepdaughter. The phrase “My Story Will Empower Me” has stuck in my throat. As my heart was breaking for what this young girl had gone through, in the end, she knows Truth. What man used for evil, He will use for His glory. Somehow, someway, her story will give the strength to someone else to SPEAK UP and GET OUT. Her strength and courage leave me in awe. I’m so proud of this young lady.

A TRUE story of several years of abuse and the suicidal ideations this young lady had at a very young age. She is NOT a victim. This girl is a survivor and a child of the King. Please be mindful that I will not tolerate judgment or hateful things if I leave comments. All names have been changed to protect her.

Her Story

Donald,

Sometimes, I like to lay in bed and daydream about what my life would be like had you not abused me for many years. I want to think that I would be able to look at myself in the mirror and not be utterly disgusted with myself. Maybe I could undress in front of a mirror without cringing every time I see myself. Perhaps I would feel more comfortable around older men.

I Wasn’t the Only One.

You took a genuine interest in my sister, but you preferred to take pictures of her. You saved the majority of touching for me. One of the primary examples of touching I remember is when we would walk next to each other. You would put your arm around me and grab my butt. Sometimes, you would switch it up and rest your hand on my butt.

When It Began

I remember the abuse started when I was about nine, but I’m sure it happened well before then. Never will I forget you making us change in front of you. I remember my sixth-grade year when you made me and my sister rotate, who would change directly in front of you, and how you wouldn’t let us wear anything to the bed besides our underwear. I also remember when you were in a particularly good mood, and you would make us sleep naked so you could come into our room and stare at our bodies.

Innocence Stolen

What traumatized me the most was when you made me and my sister go into the little garage with you. You made my sister lock the door and told us to get completely naked. I remember how shaky my hands were while taking off my clothes. I was so scared of what you were going to do next. You called it “checking us for ticks,” but I know that’s not why you were doing it because you didn’t make our brothers do it either. I also know that wasn’t the real reason because I remember you waited until our mom left to do it. We couldn’t have been in the garage for long, but it felt like a lifetime trapped in there with you.

I vividly remember what it felt like when your rough hands traced every single inch of my body. If I had the choice to forget one day in my life, that would be the day. That was the day that you took my innocence from me. I was ten years old. No ten-year-olds should ever have to feel how I felt on that day. Ten-year-olds should be playing dress-up, not getting abused by their stepfathers. I trusted you. I loved you, and I thought you loved me too. What you did was not love.

Wanting Out

At night, I would lay in bed and think of ways to kill you so the abuse would stop. If I wasn’t plotting to kill you, I was planning ways to kill myself. I didn’t care what it took. I wanted out of the situation. It’s crazy to think about how much I wanted to die at ten. How many ten-year-olds do you know that want to commit suicide?

Anger Flows Freely

I’m angry that you took my innocence from me. You took my childhood. I’m mad you didn’t feel guilty for what you did to me. Also, I’m angry that you didn’t spend the rest of your life in jail. Honestly, I’m mad that you are still alive and my mother still loves you. I’m angry you guys got married. She chose you over me. I’m mad you locked my brother in his room for a week because you thought he was faking it. I had to sneak him food and water. I am so angry about that. I’m mad you waited so long to take him to the hospital.

Even after he was diagnosed {with brain cancer}, you treated him like crap because you thought he was doing it for attention. I’m angry I didn’t get to be there with my brother as he was dying because of you. I don’t know how you live with yourself. How do you sleep at night? I hope you are miserable. I hope the guilt about my brother eats you up inside.

Wishes for My Future

If and when I have children, I will do everything I can to protect them from people like you. I promise that I won’t be like you or my mother. My children will never have to worry about men watching them change or shower. My children will never look in the mirror and hate themselves because of what happened. Hopefully, one day, I will be able to forgive you. I hope one day I will look in the mirror and be proud of who I am and what I have overcome. I wish I could say that this won’t happen to other little girls, but I know many people like you.

My Story Will Empower Me

I hope one day soon that I will be able to publicly tell my story so that other women can speak up about their stories. You will lose your grip on me one day, and I’ll love myself again. Soon, I will love my body. I will no longer be ashamed of you, and my story will empower me. One day soon, you’ll die, and I will sleep a tad bit better at night. You will get what is coming to you and deserve every bit of it.

You will have to answer for what you did to me one of these days. There is nothing you can ever say or do to make up for what you did to me. One of these days, I will be doing better than ever. Your abuse never has and will never define who I am or where I’m going. I hope you are happy with the choices you’ve made in life. I hope that it was all worth it in the end.

Yours Truly,

Nicole

Resources

If you or someone you know is being abused, PLEASE reach out.

ChildHelp Hotline

National Domestic Violence Hotline

Suicide Prevention Lifeline